Sympathy flower have been a party of funeral and memorial traditions in nearly every culture throughout history. Flowers add warmth, beauty and dignity to the service and, for many, symbolize eternal life.
Changing trends in how we say good-bye to loved ones, however, often leave family and friends uncertain about how to appropriately express their sympathy.
At KAY’S Petals & Plants we understand how to help you choose a floral tribute as a fitting remembrance to a family member, friend or business acquaintance.
Here are some answers to commonly asked questions about sympathy flowers:
Q. I found out about the death after the funeral was over. What can I do?
A. A floral arrangement received at the home after the activity surrounding the funeral can be a comforting, welcome reminder that friends haven’t forgotten. In fact, research shows that bereaved family and friends appreciate being though of in the weeks or months after the funeral. A personal note or “we are thinking of you” message with the flowers would be especially nice. Any support you can offer during the grieving process will let them know you care.
Q. Are there any options to flowers that are too “funeral looking”?
A. Although very traditional sympathy arrangements are still requested in many parts of the country, most florists today are happy to create a floral tribute that is original, creative and appropriate. These more contemporary arrangements, using a variety of flowers and containers, provide the family with the option to take them home, give them to close friends, or deliver to hospitals, nursing homes, or places of worship after the service. Mixed flower arrangements which look “just picked from the garden” are a popular options, as are baskets of green and flowering plants. Your professional florist can suggest a variety of floral sympathy tributes.
Q. Sometimes I see a charity mentioned “in lieu of flowers” in the death notice. Is it still appropriate to send flowers?
A. Because flowers help you say what is often difficult to express, they are always appropriate and in good taste. Many people want to express their sympathy and how respect for the deceased in a variety of ways, including charitable contributions, food donations, a helping hand, and cards and flowers sent to the family’s home or to the funeral service. Flowers also play a functional role, adding warmth to the service and providing the visible emotional support that the bereaved need during this time. Funeral directors tell us that most people do not want a service completely devoid of flowers.
Q. Do some flower arrangements look too “cheery” for a funeral?
A. Absolutely not. A funeral service is a way to honour someone’s life and bright, colourful flowers are a meaningful party of this tribute. In addition to adding beauty to an otherwise somber occasion, flowers provide a comforting diversion something to talk about or look at – during the visitation.
Q. What can I do to make my arrangement special from the rest?
A. To make your floral tribute particularly special, ask your florist to create an arrangement that fits the deceased’s personality in some way. A rustic basket of wildflowers to honour someone who loved the outdoors, for example,. You could also include his or her favourite flowers or colours or a flower that has special significance in your relationships with that person. Whatever you do, the family is sure to notice and appreciate it.
Q. I am part of a group. What are some suggestions?
A. When groups, including grandchildren, nieces and nephews, friends, neighbours, business associates and clubs go in together on flowers, the arrangements can be very special and make a large showing. Such pieces can include standing sprays and wreaths. When sending flowers as a group, be sure to include a contact name and address on the card so the family knows who to thank.
Q. What is appropriate to tend for a cremation?
A. A tastefully done floral tribute adds beauty to any type of memorial service, whether it’s a traditional burial or cremation. Because cremation is increasingly common in some areas, many florists will have specific suggestions. Families may choose a piece designed for display with the urn, or an arrangement that can be enjoyed in the home after the service
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